Day Seven: Thats just for you
My lover. I was gonna say notebooks, since I have notebooks and diaries that I feel are really private. I write down my thoughts for the day, fears and sometimes drafts of my stories and poems. But, I decided to go with lover instead. I just felt like it was what I wanted to say.
My lover is mine. I tend to be jealous and possessive. I’ve seen love fail first-hand and second-hand, trust me. Courted you because it was a bet? Been there. Played you because it looks like fun? Oh, many times. Took advantage? You bet. Courted you when he doesnt even like you, not even a bit? Oh well, the point is it was bad. It was traumatizing for me.
You can say I was pretty gullible and pathetic to think that guys will actually take me seriously and really love me. So for the nth time after being left behind and cheated on, I chose to fall inlove again and again. But the last time was my last shot. I was actually skeptical about it but went on with it anyway, what could go wrong?
Oh, I’ve never been so wrong. I opened my heart this time around but the difference is, I was very serious and hopeful. Note that before this, my parents are having trouble with their relationship so my point of views about love have drastically changed and this was my last call and unfortunately, it failed. Just like any other. Short story short, he didn’t really like me and left me for someone else and he was even the bitter one. Great. As expected, I quit love.
For more than a year, I’ve had flings but I never really liked them. I only have a few crushes and that’s that. Just a crush; an admiration for the mean time. But aside from that, nope. Not at all even when there are persuasive guys.
But then one day on a random circumstance, I met the man I’m in a relationship with, right now. It was very random and we just clicked. Before I knew it, I was in love again. I let things happen and opened up when I felt that he was serious and now, we are 9 months in to our relationship. So you get why I’m the possessive type but not the obsessed type. Although the jealous part well, *whispers* its in my genes.
So that’s that. I may be pretty young for a real relationship as some may say but we are happy and content and that’s all that matters. Right?